Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Autumn Reflections

The morning snow falls, down from the sky, the clouds overhead, lightly landing on the grasses green and leaves yellow. It is October 1st and already a snowy landscape is being painted here in the interior mountains of Colorado. I, in the bliss of season's change, am entering an introspectively reflective space. With the snow comes some biological change, germinating from inside out.

The sun peeks out of the clouds every now and again in the early morning sky, smiling as it does todos los dias somewhere, always. At and adjacent table, in the coffee shop where I write, a couple in their late 50s attempts conversation, while a beautiful young lady passes, nabbing my attention for a quick second in one passing swoop. Easily distracted and similarly reminded, I focus on writing. Somehow, the couple reminds me of the delicate balance and compromise that is required for a long-term relationship to thrive. Observing the man's body language with no ear for what is being said, I percieve his disinterest in his wife's conversational pieces. That, or I am projecting how I, in some manner or another, have been in those shoes - either directly, or through seeing my own father and mother interact, and the lack of complete interest and engagement. A swift feeling of sadness wells up inside, enough for me to notice its internal uttering.

Jimi's guitar and words, synchronized with his heart and soul, play in my ears and dance on my heart...
it's only a dream, I'd love to tell somebody about this dream: the sky was filled with a thousand stars, while the sun kissed the mountains blue, and eleven moons played across the rainbows above me and you... 

This stomach of mine grumbles, not enough fuel of solidity has entered this morning. Choosing coffee over tea this morning, plus a singular banana, has not been enough to quell the internal hunger riot forming in my innards. My hands are cold, though not nearly as chilled as they were the night before as I sat beside my bed in the van - bearing the cold evening air, not yet filled with snow particulate, to finish a book - The Celestine Prophecy. Powerful were its messages, the most prominent for me was about control dramas - ways we manipulated for energy, attention, since we were children, and how these dramas still remain consciously true in our adult lives. Again, I think of the man and woman couple, his aloof drama combined with her poor me drama; they both desired energy, attention, and in the complexity of their shared lives, they may have forgotten how to tap into the universal love that is all around us. Instead, when narrowly focused, we attempt to subtly control others for their energy, so that we can be filled again.

I notice how, while listening to Jimi play and sing, that I feel filled - energized by the beauty that he shared with the world and I wonder how else in my day I will tap into universality. I love this feeling, that life is a huge mural, with real consequences, interactions and experiences, upon which we paint our mutual existences. I pray that this never changes.

Thinking of my own morality, reminded by the chill of seasons changing, I grasp how I'll go about making the most of this visit to Earth that I am blessed with - living love forward. That sounds a solid approach plan.

The sun warms the ground through the clouds and those upon it. The mountains, too, warm the heart with their illustrious grandeur, all dusted in white. Thank you for this perspective; for continually loving!

In the spirit of change that autumn reflections bring,
Alan
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